Recently, I have been slammed with hate comments to a particular blog I wrote. I’m not one for negativity, so I deleted that particular piece from my blog. I am ready to clarify my views on the subject, because snobbery from people due to their own ignorance should not be a reason why I remove something.
My grandmother was diagnosed with breast cancer when I was 12 years old. And so began the radiation and chemotherapy that made her lose her hair. The first time here hair fell out, my sister and I were not around, so I’m not really sure how she took it. I just remember her coming to pick us up from school with a scarf wrapping her head (not due to the lack of hair; it was cool outside).
Her hair began to grow back in. Mostly she would not wear a wig, with the exception to going to her club meetings. That was more for their benefit, not hers. She was very positive about the near bald head, saying it was all the rage. Her courage, to this day, brings me to tears.
One day in the summer (my sister and I would spend the weekdays at her house while mom was at work), we went outside to play with the a neighborhood friend. About 20-30 minutes after leaving, I had to come back inside to ask my grandma something. I found her in her bathroom brushing out clumps of her hair. The hair was in her brush, in her hand, and on the floor. Being young, it scared me. But my grandmother just smiled. I don’t remember what was said, and if she had any fear or doubts, I did not know they existed.
I am thankful for my grandmother’s boldness. She did not survive her battle with breast cancer, but I am grateful for the time I got to spend with her. She showed me that you can be beautiful with and you can be beautiful without, because it is not about physicality. Everything that makes a person stunning radiates from their soul. If you solely rely on physical beauty, but have nothing but hate/bitterness on the inside, you will not glow and be truly sublime.
Burgundy Haze said,
September 13, 2009 at 10:42 am
Well, I still don’t think I’m ignorant for not wanting to donate my hair to a scam organization or any organization. Nor do I think my comment to you was hateful. But I appreciate that you were able to get your thoughts out this time without bashing long haired women. And I’m assuming that, “If you solely rely on physical beauty”, isn’t directed at long haired people who have no interest in cutting it.
And fyi, since I don’t think you understood me. To many people with long hair, if we wanted to conform to societies view on beauty, then we wouldn’t have long hair in the first place. I think I mentioned this before, but I’ve been insulted a lot for having long hair. It’s just not seen as beautiful to most people in western society.
I hope you don’t take offense to this. I’m just trying to get my point across, just like you are. And I’m sorry about your grandmother.
captivatingone said,
September 13, 2009 at 10:58 am
I appreciate your comment. I don’t think you understood what I was saying, just like I didn’t understand what you were saying. I think women with long hair and women with short hair are beautiful; it’s just the way they present yourself to the world that gets to me. Trust me, most of the women I know do have long hair, and it is a quasi-conformity (as is short hair…come on, there are so many styles and looks out there). I never intended to bash long-haired women. I meant to point out that if you go on a reality make over show, you should expect to get your hair cut (lol, that’s what started this whole thing).
And most of your comments were fine, lol. It was the girls that thought I should be dead for expressing myself that got to me (thus the removal of the original blog). Thanks for understanding